Tuesday, September 29, 2009

working mom vs. stay at home mom

Adjusting to being back at work has been much harder than I originally planned. The beginning of the school year is always hectic, but it eventually slows down. However, this school year isn't showing any signs of letting up. At the end of every school day I spend countless hours in front of my computer sending emails relating to my extra duty as fourth grade team leader. By the time I am done, it's late and I'm worn out and I don't have the energy to do my own work. All I want to do is go home and play with baby Bryce (who won't be a baby much longer). With the stress of this new school year and my all around negative attitude towards it and the lack of time I get to spend with Bryce, Jason has suggested that I consider staying home with Bryce.

Before I started teaching, I had always said I wanted to teach for 3 years and then have a baby and stay home. Once I began my career as a teacher, I decided that I put too much work into my degree to only use it for 3 years. We ended up waiting a little while before starting our family and I decided that staying home wasn't for me. Well..........now that I have a child and I know what it's like to stay home (LOVE summer and maternity leave) and to work, I'm beginning to question things all over again.

I LOVE that Jason thinks I should stay home, but it really is a big decision to make, not only financially, but emotionally, too. I worked hard to get my job, I love the people I work with , and overall, I love what I do. I honestly never thought this would be a decision I would be faced with.

I'm considering all the pros and cons of this situation. We both agreed that maybe there was a reason we haven't had any luck selling our house. Maybe it's God's plan for us to stay in this house and me stay at home with Bryce. If we were to sell our house and move, we wouldn't be able to afford for me to stay home. When I think about everything that goes into this decision, I get even more overwhelmed. I've got to stick it out for this school year, so it will give me some time to really think and pray on it. I will be sure to share the final verdict when we reach one!


Heather said...

what a tough decision! i know that i can only do the stay at home thing for like two years, then i need something else, like i was a waitress when Fiona went to preschool. after a while that got old and i'm ready to do the stay at home thing again! i'll be praying for you.

Sara said...

It is a very difficult decision - I've been there! - but in the end, you will do what is right for your family :) I remember thinking the same thing as you - I went through 4 years of college and felt like I was giving it all up so soon, but you can always go back! Work (unfortunately!) will always be there whenever you're ready :)

Anonymous said...

I pray God gives you wisdom as to what you need to do for your family. For our family we prayed and felt lead that I should stay home. Of course it has come with some sacrifice, but it has been best for us! I know though that is not the case for everyone, so no matter what you do just follow God's will and your heart and you can't go wrong.

Blessings, Ginger